Homer
Homer is the father of the family. He works in Mr. Burns' nuclear plant as a safety technician after passing the specialized training course on his third attempt. Once during a strike, Homer's critical functions could be filled only by a brick placed on a lever. Homer was also voted Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Toxic Waste Handler of the Month in October of 1990. He spends his time eating donuts, watching television and acting stupid. He still has a father living in a retirement home who is almost as stupid as his son. Typical quotes from Homer: "D'oh! ", "Mmmmmm... donuts (or fill in an edible, or even a non edible items)."
A devoted husband, Homer leaves his wife with few complaints. When pressed however, Marge did once acknowledge to a marriage counselor that Homer "forgets birthdays, anniversaries, holidays (both religious and secular), chews with his mouth open, hangs out at a seedy bar with bums and low life's, blows his nose in the towels and puts them back in the middle, and scratches himself with his keys." Despite these few foibles, Homer loves his family, and he'll do just about anything to prove it--even if that means making himself look foolish. Homer's favorite book and/or pamphlet is "So, You've Decided to Steal Cable," which also happens to be the most recent book and/or pamphlet he has read. When he's not reading, Homer enjoys drinking beer, at home or in a bar. His favorite haunts include Moe's Tavern, Greasy Joe's Bar-B-Q Pit, Gulp 'N' Blow, and The Frying Dutchman, which he almost put out of business on its "All You Can Eat Night." Since then, Homer's picture has hung in the restaurant, where he's known as "Bottomless Pete: Nature's Cruelest Mistake." Sometimes frustrated at being fat and bald, Homer enjoys flashbacks now and again, which show him fat with a full head of hair. Two things, though, always remain constant for Homer, no matter what happens to him: his happy-go-lucky nature and his love for Marge and his kids.
Marge
Marge is the mother of the humble abode. She loves her family, works like no mother has worked before and has two gruesome sisters, Patty and Selma. Typical quote: "Mmmmmm...." Marge's responsibilities include Homer Snuggling, Cupcake Baking, Over-Worrying, Perpetual Cleaning, TV Violence Crusading, Diaper Changing and Unbearable Mothering. Marge is the putty that just barely holds the Simpson family together week after week. By sensibly drawing the line at such frivolous expenses as an electric garage door opener and changes of clothing for her children, Marge manages to stretch Homer's modest salary to cover the tremendous costs incurred by a family of the '90's: Homer's beer and donut supply, and such necessary expenses as his recent day trip to India to meet the owner of the Kwik-E-Mart Corporation. Marge's one extravagance is having her tall blue hair done twice a day. Her hair does come in handy, however, as it enables the Simpsons to locate one another easily when they visit an amusement park or zoo.
Lisa
Lisa Simpson is the neglected one in the family. Politically correct prodigy for the following: Pony rights, Vegetarianism, The Corey Hotline, Longer school days Against: Meat, Universal Injustice, Malibu Stacey, Whacking Day, Laramie Cigarettes Mentor: The late Bleeding Gums Murphy. Lisa Simpson takes after both her parents: she has Marge's common sense, hard work ethic and sympathy for others; she has Homer's last name. Lisa's enormous intelligence and moral authority place her in a unique position in the Simpson family -- and, for that matter, Springfield at large. Each parents' night at Springfield Elementary, Homer and Marge fight to meet with Lisa's teachers rather than Bart's on the theory that being offered a tin of cookies as thanks is less "upsetting" and "costly" than reviewing quarterly property damage assessments for melted playground equipment. This second grader also plays the saxophone with the virtuosity, if not stubble, of Springfield's late blues great, Bleeding Gums Murphy. For the record, Lisa says she watches TV only for "The MacNeil-Lehrer Report" -- particularly since it expanded to one hour -- and any Masterpiece Theatre serialization of wordy British novels. In truth, however, she is always willing to interrupt a piercing MacNeil-Lehrer round table whenever her beloved "Itchy and Scratchy" cartoons are on TV. Her deep love for cartoon characters proves that, no matter how precocious she may be, Lisa is still a Simpson.
Bart
Bart is a 10-year old disaster. Hates: school, going to church, growing up, writing blackboard punishments, Ms. Krabappel (teacher), Principal Skinner, the Flanders family (their neighbors), Sideshow Bob. Loves: Krusty the Klown, Itchy and Scratchy, skateboarding, singing perverted songs, and anything that's prohibited by law. Typical quotes: "Ay, carumba!", "Cool!" Bart is the most misunderstood Simpson. He is constantly frustrated by the narrow-minded people of Springfield who judge him merely by his thoughts and actions. At heart, he's just a good kid with a few bad ideas and one or two that are still being reviewed by the Springfield district attorney. Basically, Bart is no different from any ordinary fourth grader. He enjoys skateboarding, bubble gum, caring for his pet elephant, appearing on the "Conan O'Brien Show" and single-handedly bringing a homicidal TV sidekick to justice, twice. Bart rides an academic roller coaster, his grades running the loop-the-loop from F to D-, and back again. But he can be ingenious when the chips are down -- as long as his ingenuity is never applied to anything school-related. He even learned portions of the Talmud to help reunite his idol, Krusty the Clown, with Krusty's father, Rabbi Krustofsky. Perhaps more than anything else, Bart's first words as a baby provide a window onto his character: "Aye, Carumba!" -- as true today as they were when first uttered.
Maggie
What can you say? Suck! Suck! Maggie is probably the most intelligent of the Simpson family. She shot Mr. Burns.
